Today, I wanted to write a note to our long suffering significant others. Our significant others put up with a lot. Though we are entering a time of education and awareness for our disease, I thought a note of compassion for those that support them was due.
They endure the constant discussions at every social gathering about Celiac disease. New social contacts mean an explanation of why we can’t come to your house for dinner without a 20 minute conversation about bringing our own food. It means the camaraderie of a pitcher of beer is ruined by our need to order cider or a glass of wine. It means that the well-intentioned friend at a pot luck brought something gluten free, but we can’t eat it because we don’t know how it was prepared.
They cannot make dinner reservations at a new place without first a 20 minute review of the menu, then a 5 minute grilling of the wait staff, only to watch helplessly as we endure the results of the inevitable cross contamination.
They hold our hair back, bring us the heating pad to put on our sore stomachs, and deliver emergency toilet paper for each request in the bathroom.
Just not in the mood – really means, I want to but I was sick all day and don’t want anyone in that general area. And sometimes it means, everything hurts, so I just don’t want anyone to touch me.
Travelling with us requires hours of planning where to stop to ensure we have a safe place to eat, then later speeding to the next exit to find a restroom in sometimes questionable gas stations. And then standing outside the bathroom at those questionable gas stations to ensure our safety.
They also go gluten free in the house to make sure we have a safe place to live. They brush their teeth after their beer but before kissing us. They understand that paying for a gluten free loaf of bread that is half the size of normal bread and three times the cost shows us love. They check every label when going to the grocery store for us, just to make sure they buy the right stuff.
Our partners often put themselves in awkward social situations, endure financial burdens, and put themselves in sometimes dangerous places to protect us. Celiac disease affects them is obvious ways and many that we may not see. They do all of this out of love for their partner. And your partner may not do any of those things or maybe all of them or maybe just a few – they love and support you. And if they don’t, dump them!
As Celiac Awareness month approaches, I hope that we are extra grateful for all of the love and support our significant others give to us. I am. We couldn’t do it without you!!
Thank you. I am a significant other as well as mom and it is all consuming. People just have no idea how complicated it is to manage this disease, especially as a family that travels. When I am out alone, I find myself still being very vigilant about gluten and have to remind myself that, in those moments, I do not have to be (except to wash my hands and wipe my mouth). So, thank you for the note.